Secret Service Agent on Veep Detail Snaps "Entirely"

When an on-duty Secret Service agent acts out a bundle of bizarre behaviors, escalating to the point that she assaults her shift leader and needs to be wrestled to the ground, physically restrained, and disarmed, well, that requires serious oversight by the administration and by Congress. 

In fact, if yesterday's incident fails to bring on an oversight hearing, that would be something even more bizarre than the behavior of Special Agent Herczeg. 

This news story names names and brings the incident back to a question of Secret Service hiring policies, Secret Service Scuffle Prompts DEI, Vetting Scrutiny:

Herczeg also screamed at the special agent in charge (SAIC), rattling off the names of female officers on the vice president’s detail and claiming they would show up and help her and allow her to continue working. At that point, other agents on the scene believed Herczeg was suffering from a mental lapse, and the superior officer, SAIC, approached her to tell her she was relieved from the assignment.

“That’s when she snapped entirely,” one source recounted.

Appparently, she hadn't snapped entirely until the other agents at the scene needed to remove her pistol and handcuff her.

We can only hope Special Agent Herczeg gets the mental health treatment she needs. And it wouldn't hurt at all if the Secret Service itself were given some shock therapy.   

Pistols, Patches, and Pelican Cases = All It Takes To Cosplay as a Cop

The latest Secret Service scandal rolls on, along with conspiracy theories fueled by the Pakistan national identity card and the two passports with Iranian visas and entry/exit stamps that were found in the several apartments occupied by those two curious characters. 

But here's my favorite part of Washington's fake DHS agents scandal, the freebies those two got just for pretending to be cops:

A former representative of Crossing DC who worked at the building since the start of Taherzadeh's lease confirmed that none of the units were being paid for at any time. When asked why they were not paying rent on the units, the individual responded with one word: 'Government'.

Government?! Has that ever worked for you? I know it hasn't worked for me, but then, I admit I've never tried asking my mortgage holder if I could skip making payments because "Government."

Read the criminal complaint here and take note of the remarkably thin window dressing that was all it took to convince at least five Secret Service agents plus local Metro Police officers that those two wild and crazy guys were actually federal law enforcement officers. They carried the correct pistols for Secret Service agents, first a SIG 229 and then a Glock 19, even exchanging insider tidbits about the Glock transition course which the real Secret Service agents - AKA dupes - were taking. Sprinkle around a few shoulder patches and pose for a photo in front of a closet shelf stacked with Pelican gun cases and, why, anyone would be fooled. I mean, they would, wouldn't they?

Maybe it was giving the credulous cops free use of apartments and vehicles that overcame any doubts they may have secretly harbored. Anyway, the scam worked fine until it encountered a Postal Inspector, i.e., a law enforcement officer from one of the humbler and less romanticized federal agencies, who saw through the costumes.   

As an aside, I am kind of pleased to learn that DC city cops never questioned either the open or concealed carry of pistols by those two fraudulent feds. Despite all the gun bans in DC, it seems you may walk around armed so long as you add a little police paraphernalia to your daily wear. Hey, I have gun belts and other pieces of equipment with which to accessorize my office garb, why haven't I ever tried just adding a pistol and a couple magazines? It seems that might work.

As yet a further aside, I recall reading in G. Gordon Liddy's autobiography that when he first came to Washington as a political appointee in the Treasury Department he phonied-up a badge and credentials for himself as an excuse to - illegally - carry a pistol. Since Treasury was known to have lots of obscure law enforcement functions, he reasoned, he would be able to brazen it out should a local cop ever question his gun. Today, it's DHS that is know to have myriad obscure law enforcement functions, so its the clear choice for today's fraudsters.

In Today's News, Phony DHS Cops Dupe Real Secret Service Agents

A very weird news item that explains why a DC apartment building was raided yesterday. https://t.co/Sz2MEFV36m

— TSB (@TweetingTSB) April 7, 2022

The Secret Service has had its fair share of scandals, and more, but a new one is shaping up today that might be particularly damning because it is the rare one that involves professional misjudgment rather than personal misbehavior.

According to the Daily Mail:

[Arian] Taherzadeh and [Haider] Ali are accused of posing as members of a fake Department of Homeland Security taskforce investigating gang violence and the January 6 Capitol riots. The pair, whose nationalities have not been revealed, are said to have driven around in an official-looking SUV equipped with flashing lights.

They are said to have successfully ingratiated themselves with Secret Service agents, who they supplied with rent-free luxury apartments, high-end electronics and policing equipment. Four members of the agency - including the first lady's bodyguard - have been placed on leave, with their identities not revealed.

In one instance, Taherzadeh allegedly offered a member of First Lady Jill Biden's security detail with a $2,000 assault rifle. He and Ali also reportedly supplied a USSS agent with a penthouse apartment valued at more than $40,000 a year.

It is unclear what they had hoped to gain from the ruse, and prosecutors say the investigation is ongoing, even as four members of the Secret Service - including the one from the first lady's security detail - have been placed on leave.

According to the WaPo (here) this genius scheme to do who-knows-what was foiled when the phony DHS agents voluntarily assisted a Postal Inspector who was investigating an assault on a mailman which they, eagled-eyed and on high alert as always for signs of terrorist activity, claimed to have witnessed.

The [Postal] inspector learned the men were in contact with several members of the Secret Service and had provided gifts to them or their families and use of the SUV, the affidavit states. The document did not explain how the inspector learned about the gifts.

The inspector informed [the real] DHS, which then informed the FBI.

Wow. Assuming the details being reported are true and even close to complete, there ought to be a lot of egg on a lot of federal law enforcement faces today.

Secret Service Shoots Itself in the Foot

What is going on at the U.S. Secret Service? I mean, I dislike Representative Jason Chaffetz as much as anyone, but really? Leaking gossipy tidbits to the press is very petty harassment, not to mention a violation of the Privacy Act when those tidbits come from your internal official files. Also not to mention stupid and reckless, since who else but Secret Service insiders could have accessed the 12-year old file on Chaffetz's unsuccessful application for a Secret Service agent job, and didn't they realize that would come back to bite the Service at a time when it can ill afford any more scandals?

The OIG report on this incident is short and sweet. A couple excerpts:

We have substantially completed our review of the allegation and have determined that a Secret Service database containing sensitive personally identifiable information (PII) pertaining to Congressman Jason Chaffetz, Chairman of the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform, was accessed on approximately 60 occasions by Secret Service employees. We have concluded that a vast majority of those who had accessed the information did so in violation of the Privacy Act, as well as Secret Service and DHS policy. Additionally, we identified one individual who acknowledged disclosing information protected by the Privacy Act to an outside source. However, because the number of individuals with access to this information was so great, we were unable to identify others who may have disclosed protected information to third parties.

[Chaffetz's] application had not been acted upon and the applicant had not been interviewed, reflected in MCI by a data field that read “BQA,” which meant that other better qualified applicants existed.

We identified 18 supervisors at the GS-15 or Senior Executive Service level who appeared to have known or should have known, prior to the publication of the fact, that Chairman Chaffetz’ MCI record was being accessed.

Moreover, at least one senior Secret Service executive, who knew about the fact of the Chaffetz application, suggested that it be leaked. On March 31st, two days before the publication of the information, Ed Lowery, who is an Assistant Director and in charge of training for the Secret Service, replied to an email from Faron Paramore, another Assistant Director who was in charge of Congressional and public affairs. Paramore’s email distributed a press statement by Secretary Johnson regarding Chairman Chaffetz’ decision to subpoena Secret Service agents. Lowery’s reply, sent only to Paramore, is reprinted in its entirety:

"Some information that he might find embarrassing needs to get out there."

An Assistant Director was incautious enough to say that in an e-mail? A 'better qualified applicant' will be found for his job very soon, I think.

Nine U.S. Troops Punished in Cartagena Prostitution Scandal

Troops and prostitutes - nothing new there

The U.S. Secret Service was quick to investigate the prostitution-and-misconduct scandal that occurred during the Presidential trip to Cartagena last April. As a result of that investigation, eight Secret Service agents were fired or resigned, three were cleared, and one lost his security clearance.

The U.S. Southern Command, however, took its time investigating the military members who supported that Cartagena trip, and has only now released its report.

From the WaPo, report says military members brought prostitutes to Colombia hotel:

A dozen U.S. service members brought women, likely prostitutes, to their hotel rooms in Colombia and also allowed dogs to soil bed linens and building grounds shortly before President Barack Obama arrived in the country for an April summit, according to a military investigation that followed the announcement of punishments for the men.

The dogs ran out of control, too? Yes, but ignore that part for now. Back to the troops:

Seven Army soldiers and two Marines have received administrative punishments for what the report described as misconduct consisting “almost exclusively of patronizing prostitutes and adultery.” Three of the service members have requested courts martial, which would give them a public trial to contest the punishments.

Since 2005, the Uniform Code of Military Justice has outlawed the patronizing of prostitutes. It is punishable by dishonorable discharge, forfeiture of all pay and allowances, and confinement for one year. I don't know whether any servicemen have ever actually been convicted of that offense - possibly none have - but given the high level of political interest in this scandal, those three guys could be the first.

The military report concluded that “the combination of unstructured free time, the prevalence of legalized prostitution and military members’ individual choice to commit misconduct,” were the primary causes of the transgressions. It also found that there was no evidence that the interaction with prostitutes presented any risk to national security, and that no sensitive materials were compromised.

That unstructured free time does pile up when you're on TDY, doesn't it?

The investigation also concluded that there was no broad coordinated effort to commit the misconduct or to cover it up later, although there were some instances where military members may have made misleading or “factually unlikely” statements when questioned about the matter.

Factually unlikely statements? That's a very generous way for SOUTHCOM to characterize it.

By the way, the Cartagena prostitute whose complaint about being short-changed led to all these investigations is now reported to be opening a non-profit organization to assist women who want to get out of prostitution.

Apologies All Around At Secret Service Oversight Hearing

Thou hast committed fornication,
But that was in another country, 
And besides, the wench is dead.      

- The Jew of Malta (Christopher Marlowe) 


Forgive and forget. That seemed to be the theme at today's Senate Homeland Security Committee hearing with Secret Service Director Sullivan.

Committee Chairman Lieberman sounded apologetic (I know, something about Lieberman's voice makes him always sound apologetic, but today he really meant it) for even coming close to suggesting that there is a systemic problem with either agent misbehavior or Service management. Senator Susan Collins was not convinced by Sullivan's contention that Cartagena was an isolated episode, but she certainly wasn't going to go overboard and call for him to step down or anything. Just forgive and forget.

Sullivan gave his self-exoneration, the senators fretted a bit - Lieberman less and some junior members more - everyone praised Secret Service agents in general and Sullivan in particular, and then the Committee adjourned.   



From the WaPo (here):

Mark Sullivan, who has enjoyed strong bipartisan congressional support in the weeks since the scandal, told a Senate panel that “I am deeply disappointed, and I apologize for the misconduct of these employees and the distraction that it has caused.” Putting it more bluntly later, Sullivan said the employees involved “did some really dumb things.”

But under questioning, Sullivan refused to submit that the mid-April incident is part of a broader agency culture that condones heavy drinking, partying and sex during the off-hours of security assignments. He also dismissed as “absurd” reports by The Washington Post that tolerance for inappropriate conduct is part of a culture that some employees call the “Secret Circus.”

-- snip --

Despite the skepticism [of the purportedly isolated nature of the Cartagena incident], Lieberman, Collins and other senators said Sullivan should remain as director.

Not much to see today.

Cartagena Investigation Spreads To DEA

The news media is reporting tonight that two DEA agents assigned to Cartagena are under investigation for allegedly hiring Colombian prostitutes. Unlike in the Secret Service incident, these agents were resident in Cartagena. Also unlike in the earlier incident, they kept their indiscretions indoors and in private. Most interestingly, DEA was reportedly informed of this matter by the Secret Service. Huh ...

Washington (CNN) -- Three Drug Enforcement Administration agents are under investigation for allegedly hiring prostitutes in Cartagena, Colombia, a congressional source confirms to CNN.

According to this source, House Homeland Security Chairman Peter King, R-New York, and committee investigators have been "aware of this for some time."

-- snip --

[Senator Susan Collins (R-Maine) of the Senate Homeland Security Committee] released a statement today later Monday, saying, "It's disturbing that we may be uncovering a troubling culture that spans more than one law enforcement agency.

"In addition to the Secret Service scandal, we now learn that at least two DEA agents apparently entertained female foreign national masseuses in the Cartagena apartment of one of the agents. The evidence uncovered thus far indicates that this likely was not just a one-time incident," Collins added in her statement.

DEA spokesman Rusty Payne said the matter has been turned over to the Justice Department inspector general.

"The Drug Enforcement Administration was provided information from the Secret Service unrelated to the Cartagena hotel Secret Service incident, which DEA immediately followed up on, making DEA employees available to be interviewed by the Department of Justice's Office of Inspector General. DEA takes allegations of misconduct very seriously and will take appropriate personnel action, if warranted, upon the conclusion of the OIG investigation," Payne said.

The DEA was provided this information by the Secret Service? It isn't clear how the Secret Service was in a position to know about the call-in masseuse appointments of DEA agents in Cartagena, but I assume the information came from Secret Service contacts with either the DEA agents themselves or the masseuses. (Masseuses, escorts ... I guess no commercial sex worker in Cartagena calls herself a prostitute.)

The Secret Service Director is scheduled to testify before Congress on Wednesday, and that might possibly have some bearing on the timing of this leak to CNN by a congressional source.

For the Drug Enforcement Administration, this might not have a happy ending.

The Big Reveal - Week 4 Of The Secret Service Scandal

Dania Suarez was interviewed by NBC News in Madrid today. She claimed to be negotiating with a publisher for a book about her role in the incident in Cartagena. I'm not sure what she could have to say about it that has not already been said, but she gave out a few teasers during the interview.

The Secret Service agents she encountered at the Pley Club were egotistical hardbodies, crazy dancers, and seemed to be experienced at the business of hiring prostitutes, Suarez said.

The agent she departed the club with clearly understood that her meter was running. She even used sign language to spell out "800 dollars" so that there would be no confusion.

Then, Suarez dropped a bombshell, revealing for the first time anywhere that ...

... she and ex-agent Arthur Huntington had sex. "Normal sex." After which he fell asleep. (What a lightweight!)

Suarez had perhaps the final word on the scandal when she told NBC News that the agents got what they deserved:

"I'm not to blame for being attractive. They are to blame for leaving their duty behind," she said.

"They seem like completely stupid, idiots. I don't know how Obama had them in his security force. What dumb men."

While she was in Madrid, Suarez was also interviewed for the first time by U.S. government investigators, the  Associated Press reported. 

Colombia prostitute at center of Secret Service scandal interviewed at US Embassy in Madrid:

Nearly four weeks after the Secret Service prostitution scandal erupted, U.S. government investigators on Thursday interviewed the Colombia prostitute [sic, because we know she was an escort, not a prostitute] at the center of the affair, which cost eight officers and supervisors their jobs and became an election-year embarrassment for the Obama administration.

Dania Londono Suarez voluntarily met with investigators at the U.S. Embassy in Madrid, agency spokesman Edwin Donovan said. He said the Secret Service investigation was nearly complete. More than 200 people, including most of the women involved, have been interviewed in the United States and Colombia.

Londono mysteriously disappeared days after the incident and couldn’t be reached by investigators.

In a radio and television interview from Madrid on May 4, Londono said she works as a prostitute [sic, again] in Colombia, catering to foreigners. She said after leaving Colombia, she spent some time in Dubai before going to Madrid.

She spent some time in Dubai? Suarez's mother made a remark about a "boyfriend" in Dubai during a radio interview in Colombia last week. I assume he must be one of the foreigners that Suarez catered to in Cartagena.  

In related news, Secret Service agents traveling overseas will now receive lessons from the State Department in manners, etiquette, and deportment.

That's the word from Under Secretary Kennedy himself, as Diplopundit noted yesterday:

“Since our regional security officers and our political officers are present in every embassy around the world where the Secret Service might be going as part of their mission, we’re making ourselves available to conduct briefings on individual situations in the country that they’re traveling to.”

I'm not sure that will help, but it can't hurt.

Escort Talks, Agents Balk, Magician Walks, In Week 3 Of The Secret Service Scandal

The Colombian woman at the center of the Secret Service scandal, Dania "I'm-an-escort-not-a-prostitute" Suárez, was interviewed by the news media this week and she is clearly very annoyed that her Secret Service agent-customer showed her no respect.

Dania Suárez, a 24-year old dark-haired beauty, appeared on a call-in show carried by Colombia's W Radio and Carocol Television Friday morning, telling callers the agent was "heavily intoxicated" and everything in his luggage and his papers was left open in his room and could have been easily stolen.

Suárez said [agent] Huntington fell asleep when they returned to his room and refused to answer the question of whether they actually had sex.

"If I answer this you will know what happened," she said.

Suárez said the agent "did not feel he got what he was being asked to pay for" and that this led to dispute over how much he owed her at the end of the evening.

She said she does not consider herself a prostitute, but an escort because prostitutes "are lower class and live in brothels."

You see, she's a high-class escort. Not a low-class prostitute. Get that straight, please.

The transcript of the full interview is here in Spanish.

I notice that Señorita Not-A-Prostitute showed a little disrespect of her own, calling her Secret Service clients a bunch of drunken, free-spending, gringo fools. Maybe it sounded better in Spanish.

"First bottle of vodka, second bottle of vodka, third bottle of Vodka ... They were like any other gringo. They bought alcohol like water."

In the morning, when the hotel's front desk called the room to announce that it was time for all escorts and prostitutes to clear out, the fateful dispute over money occurred.

"I say give me the [$800], but he says "go, bitch" ... I will not pay ... [but eventually] he took out his wallet and gave me 50,000 pesos."

At today's exchange rate a 50,000 Colombian peso note is worth 23 Yankee dollars and 33 cents.

I don't know, maybe Agent Huntington was short on cash after buying all that vodka. But he might have avoided so much trouble for himself if he had been just a little more considerate of Señorita Not-A-Prostitute's feelings at that moment.

Gentlemen, it seems like some of us will never learn the lesson Aretha Franklin tried to teach us: R-E-S-P-E-C-T (find out what it means to me).

Well, you might be wondering, what's the status of the seemingly inevitable photo spread in a skin magazine? It seems the magazines are not all that interested.

According to the Miami Herald's report:

Dania Suárez, the Cartagena woman who three weeks ago unleashed the sex scandal that shook the U.S. Secret Service and military, may be trying to sell her exclusive story to magazines such as Playboy or Hustler, according to rumors that have surfaced in this city on Colombia’s Caribbean coast.

“This is the way this is going to end,” said a Colombian official who asked not to be identified. “She’s going to pose nude in Playboy, where a renowned journalist will interview her and write an article telling the whole story of what happened.”

--snip --

Theresa Hennessey, a Playboy spokeswoman, told El Nuevo Herald that none of the magazine’s editors had contacted Suárez and that there are no plans to “publish her photos in the magazine.”

I hope Suárez has something to fall back on if the Playboy thing doesn't come through. Maybe she should get a GED or something. 

Meanwhile, back in Washington, the investigation into Secret Service misconduct ratcheted up a notch when Homeland Security's Office of the Inspector-General took over from the Secret Service. The OIG investigation is in addition to those of four congressional committees as well as internal reviews by the Secret Service, the military and the White House. Details are here.

Among other things, the OIG has been conducting polygraph exams of the agents. It was reported this week that some of the agents refused to submit to the polygraph, and I can't say I blame them. Could you take the polygraph seriously if you knew that its principal inventor also invented Wonder Woman and her magical Lasso of Truth that all are powerless to resist? True story.
 
It looks like they were smart to refuse. Late today, Congressmen Peter King (R-New York) announced that one of the agents who did submit to the Lasso of Truth "failed" his polygraph, which I assume means that someone doesn't believe him about something. That is contrary to the impression King had gotten earlier this week after briefings by Secret Service officials.

A key House chairman says one of the Secret Service agents accused of wrongdoing in the Colombia prostitution scandal failed a lie detector test.

Homeland Security Committee chairman Peter King said Friday that his investigators discovered that, contrary to the Secret Service’s account, one agent failed a polygraph test. King, a New York Republican, also asked why Secret Service agents have not been able to find Dania Londono Suarez, the prostitute at the center of the scandal, even though she apparently granted an interview on Friday.

King’s investigators met with Secret Service officials for three hours on Friday.

Apparently, the agent who failed his polygraph exam wasn't the only one who was being deceptive. That is not good news, since Congressman King has been perhaps the Secret Service's best friend on Capitol Hill since the Cartagena scandal broke, repeatedly defending its Director's handling of the incident. The Service can't afford to alienate him now.

And finally, we have a new loser of the week - a government contractor motivational magician. Yes, seriously.

Yesterday, the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) withdrew a published $5,000 contract solicitation for a magician to motivate employees about "The Magic of Change" at a leadership training event. You don't need a weatherman to know which way the political wind blows, and after the General Services Administration's Las Vegas spending spree, NOAA can see there is no Hope for Change.

From the WaPo, NOAA pulls ad for magician in wake of Las Vegas spending scandal:

The ad, for a speaker on “The Magic of Change,” was pulled a day after NOAA officials posted it on a federal contracting website. The agency sought a speaker for a one-day session for 45 managers to create a “unique model of translating magic and principals of the psychology of magic, magic tools, techniques and experiences into a method of teaching leadership,” according to the posting that went up Wednesday on FedBizOpps.gov

NOAA pulled the ad after media reports suggested a magician would be in poor taste.

Poor taste? I would like to think that NOAA cancelled after they questioned why anyone would want to see magic performed by the lowest bidder.

The scandal continues.

And So The Food Fight Begins ... Week Two Of The Secret Service Scandal

As Federale suspected, the Secret Service's hasty crackdown on the Cartegena agents looks like it will backfire. Reportedly, some of the agents who resigned under pressure last week are ready to fight for reinstatement. That pretty much means that they are willing to start leaking details of identical behavior by other agents on other trips, and naming the supervisors who knew of and tolerated it all. Having already been forced out, what do they have to lose?

Once that food fight starts, you just know it will spiral out of control. The media has an endless appetite for salacious stories, and a 24/7 news cycle to feed.

Congress is already grilling administration witnesses on their handling of the Secret Service. I notice that Senator Grassley is asking very specific questions about the White House staffers and (military) White House Communications Agency staff who accompany Secret Service advance units on Presidential trips. Is it just my imagination, or does he sound like he has been getting some information under the table?

If Congress runs with the scandal - and they will, during this election year summer - will the administration be able to resist the impulse to fling a little something back at Capitol Hill? I mean, come on, Congressmen and sex scandals? That has been going on ever since Constitution Avenue was a dirt road. Could there be a more tempting target?

The press limbered up its throwing arm by republished this week a U.S. News and World Report article from way back in 2002 that detailed numerous old incidents of misbehavior by Secret Service agents. Just a little something to get things started, like tossing a handful of grapes before reaching for the big, messy, pies. 

The first pie, or anyway, the first one to be publicly reported on, was thrown yesterday by a Seattle TV reporter, and it featured a March 2011 Secret Service advance visit to San Salvador. The splatter from that one hit some DEA, FBI, and U.S. Embassy officials who were in the vicinity.

Collateral splatter also occurred in Brazil, when a local reporter asked visiting U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta whatever happened to the three Marine Security Guards assigned to U.S. Embassy Brasilia who tossed a Brazilian prostitute out of their embassy van last December. That resulted in significant physical injuries to her, and, maybe now, a lawsuit against the embassy.

The administration tried to wipe some of the mess off its face today by issuing written rules for traveling Secret Service agents. No guests in hotel rooms, no drinking within ten hours of duty (or at any time in the protectee's hotel), no visiting off-limits establishments of ill repute, and so on. One of the enhanced rules of conduct requires the Secret Service's Office of Professional Responsibility to accompany agents on at least some trips, like chaperones on a High School outing.

This has the potential to get really, really, nasty. No one in Washington has more ammunition for a food fight of this sort than the agents who ride in every limo, stand in every corridor, enter every room, and generally hover all over the most senior officials. They are the fly on every White House wall. So far, the rule has been 'what happens in the limo stays in the limo.' So far, but maybe not forever. 

There was only one winner this week - the GSA. They got off scot-free while Congress and the press pursued ever so much more entertaining scandals of a sexual nature.

Winners and Losers of Week 1, Secret Service Scandal

Winner: Spirit Airlines, which spun up an advertising gimmick based on the scandal ("upfront payment is required").

Loser: The Secret Service GS-14 supervisory agent who resigned abruptly this week. Since the agent is married, 48 years old, and reportedly had almost twenty years in, I'm guessing that he wasn't quite ready yet, financially speaking, to retire. With all the notoriety surrounding him, his post-retirement opportunities in the private security industry might be disappointing. It doesn't help that he posted lots of indiscreet photos of himself - at a boozy high school reunion, with an Egyptian belly dancer, and "checking out" Sarah Palin while on her protective detail in 2008 - on his Facebook account.

Winner: The 24-year old Colombian woman who complained to police when the Secret Service agent who had picked her up the night before didn't seem to understand that he owned her $800 in the morning. She was interviewed by the New York Times this week where she stressed that her high price tag makes her one of the classier ladies that can be hired for sexual services in Cartagena. ("The price alone, she said, indicates she is an escort, not a prostitute. “You have higher rank” ... “It’s like when you buy a fine rum or a BlackBerry or an iPhone. They have a different price.”) It's a commercial hierarchy, with escorts like her at the top, followed by the prostitutes who work out of the nicer clubs, followed by the ones who work out of sleazy bars, and so on down the chain to the street-walkers and the underage runaways. She is no doubt already fielding offers for an 'as told to' book and a TV movie deal. Classy ones, naturally.

Loser: The other Secret Service GS-14 supervisory agent who got the ax this week. That one is still employed for the moment, and his lawyer says he will take full advantage of the bureaucratic process to fight his dismissal for cause. He is reported to be divorced, and his ex-wife is also a Secret Service agent.

Winner, sort of: The one Secret Service agent who is reported to have been cleared of serious charges, and faces only lesser administrative punishment.

Losers: The four non-senior Secret Service agents who have resigned as of today, ending their careers prematurely.

Likely future losers include the remaining five agents, who are all under investigation by the Secret Service's Office of Professional Responsibility, plus the eleven military service members who have been returned to their commands and are facing disciplinary procedures and possible criminal charges under the Uniform Code of Military Justice.

We might as well count Secret Service Director Mark Sullivan among the losers, since he is likely to come out of this with his, and his agency's, reputation diminished.

As the weeks go by, I think winners will be harder and harder to come by in this kerfuffle.

Another TDY Gone Wrong (Deadbeat Secret Service Agents Recalled From Colombia)

Updated at 4 PM: Since I originally posted this, there have been some unattributed statements in the Washington-based news media to the effect that the Secret Service agents had a dispute with the Caribe Hotel over room charges - the hotel expected them to pay extra for having overnight guests - and that it may have been the hotel management, rather than local prostitutes, who complained to local police.

Updated again at 5:45: The New York Times has a bit more detail on how the TDY went south.

A senior United States official who had been briefed on the matter said that investigators were sorting through accounts that more than one member of the Secret Service team may have had women in their rooms — although it was not clear whether others were prostitutes or, if so, whether the agents knew that.

“There are people who willingly went to prostitutes and other people who ended up with prostitutes,” the official said. “Either way, it’s just unacceptable.”

Specifically, the official said, on Wednesday night an agent is believed to have taken a Colombian woman back to his hotel room and had then thrown her out in a dispute over money; investigators are trying to figure out whether the agent knew that she had intended to be paid.

The woman apparently began causing a disturbance in the hallway, eventually bringing other Secret Service agents — as well as a small number of law enforcement and military officials working with them on security and communications matters — out of their rooms and attracting the attention of hotel management and security.

It emerged that others on the team also had women in their rooms. Tempers flared, compounded by the language barrier. At some point Colombian police became involved, and American government officials decided to replace the team.

I'm shaking my head ruefully. Ruefully, I tell you.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is an example of why consular officers always have the best stories of anybody in the Foreign Service:

Who could not be entertained as often as appalled by the infinite variety of troubles that visiting gringos can cause?

Ed Henry's tweet from yesterday reinforces what the WaPo's Ronald Kessler said in his interview with CNN today, the bottom line of which is that a prostitute in Cartagena complained to local police that a U.S. Secret Service agent had refused to pay her, leading the police to contact "the State Department" which in turn contacted the Secret Service.

The State Department official in that chain of phone calls was having a much better day than the Secret Service official.

I looked at several Colombian newspapers in search of juicy details, but they had nothing, really, other than the unsurprising news that the Secret Service agents involved had "bebían mucho alcohol" during their stay at the Hotel Caribe in Cartagena.

I think Homer Simpson said it best: "To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."