Saturday, April 24, 2010

Embassy Lament, One Night in Bangkok

Being in a Bangkok mood after the previous post, I can't resist embedding this song from the Cold War musical Chess, which is called Embassy Lament:



[Chorus of Diplomats]

Oh my dear how boring
He's defecting
Just like all the others
He's expecting
Us to be impressed with what he's done here
But he
Hasn't stopped to think about the paperwork
His gesture causes
We've an embassy to run here
If these people can't strike
Blows for freedom
With a valid visa
We don't need 'em
If we seem offhand then please remember
This is nothing very special
He's the fourth we've had since last November
Who do these foreign chappies think they are?
And when he's safely in the West
He'll be the hero to discuss
The media will lionise him
Fame and fortune plus
No-one will recall it's
Thanks to us

Have you an appointment
With the consul?
If you don't we know what his
Response'll
Be, he will not see you, with respect it
Buggers up his very taxing schedule
Pushing peace and understanding
Let us hope this won't affect it
Far too many jokers
Cross the border
Not a single document
In order
Russia must be empty
Though we're all for
Basic human rights it makes you wonder
What they built the Berlin wall for
Who do these foreign chappies think they are?
And when you've filled in all the forms
And been passed clear of all disease
Debriefed debugged dedrugged disarmed
And disinfected please
Don't forget the guys
Who cut your keys



And no mention of Chess would be complete without One Night in Bangkok:



I've never passed through a foreign red light district - while on official TDY business, you understand - without these lyrics running through my head:

[THE AMERICAN]

Whaddya mean? Ya seen one crowded, polluted, stinking town --

[COMPANY]

Tea, girls, warm, sweet
Some are set up in the Somerset Maugham suite

[THE AMERICAN]

Get Thai'd! You're talking to a tourist
Whose every move's among the purest
I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine

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