Secret Service: "Stand Your Ground" Against Family Dogs (But Place Hands in Your Pockets)

A FOIA request has turned up 36 pages of Secret Service emails concerning bites inflicted on agents by First Family dogs. It turns out there were quite a few more than had been admitted by the White House Spokesperson.

At the current rate an Agent or Officer has been bitten every day this week (3/1-3/8) causing damage to attire or bruising/punctures to the skin.

I can see where that would be a problem for the White House detail. Some of the bites were serious enough to require treatment by a White House doctor.

Plus, I learned a new euphemism from those emails - "dropping code," something which dogs are known to do. 

On a serious note, don't doubt for a moment that Secret Service agents are fully prepared to defend themselves against canine attackers. Since tasers and pepper spray are out of the question in that delicate situation, here are the protective tactics they employ:

Panicking or running with [sic] only embolden animals so stand your ground and protect your hands/fingers by placing them in your pockets or behind your back.

Well, what to do with the First Family's aggressive German Sheppards? 

If they asked me, I'd deputize them as Secret Service K9 auxiliaries and make a virtue out of all that doggy energy. Problem solved, and you're welcome.