Friday, August 17, 2012

"The Star Spangled Banner" Sung In The Key Of 18,000 Revs Per Minute

Now that the U.S. Army has decided to cut back on NASCAR sponsorships, I suggest that it look into Formula One racing.

NASCAR isn't bringing in enough Army recruits to justify the sponsorship costs (which are considerable - $26 million went to Dale Earnhardt Jr. and his No. 88 Chevrolet alone), so the Army might want to try something new.

You may say, "Well, Formula One is way too Euro to go over in the American heartland" and I wouldn't disagree. NASCAR has deep Appalachian roots while F1 is all about blatantly foreign stuff, like open-wheel cars and the metric system. F1 even has umlauts, such as in "N├╝rburgring."

But the Red Bull racing team's stroke of genius takes all that foreign taint away. The Army ought to hire those guys to play the national anthem at every racing event we have. If that doesn't make American motorheads stand up and salute, I don't know what will.


Anonymous said...

TSB: This is also hurting recruiting. gwb


Army suicides hit a new single-month record in July, when 38 active-duty and reserve soldiers took their own lives, according to official figures released Thursday.

Read more:

James said...

No, No, No, though an ex nascar fan, never will I like Gay Prix.

TSB said...


I might give F1 a try when they open up that new track in Austin this year. Open-wheel twisty track racing was very big with the native Americans who went to Watkins Glen in upstate NY back in my long-ago youth. I'll try to keep an open mind and excuse any berets or ascots I see there.

James said...

I can't go to F1, Junior Johnson would hunt me down. Don't worry about berets or ascots in Austin. We have flocks and flocks of fedoras. There is a high infestation rate of hipsters here. You can't swing a dead cat without hitting something "iconic or ironic" in this town. Yes I was born here (back in the days of steam radio), so if you do come I should have tips for music, food, etc. And if there's no way I can avoid it, I' ll buy lunch. I'll send contact info.